


if 2020 was an episode of glee

by kmr123



Category: Brittana - Fandom, Glee, Samcedes - Fandom, klaine - Fandom, tike - Fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:35:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26899798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kmr123/pseuds/kmr123
Summary: title says it all :) based off of amy lovatt's youtube video
Kudos: 2





	if 2020 was an episode of glee

**SCENE ONE. SCIENCE LAB.**

BRITTANY (V.O.): Hello my fellow Americans. It's Brittany S. Pierce, A.K.A, Brittany Spears A.K.A. the smartest person alive A.K.A...Brittany. I was recently asked to go to China to use my awesomeness of a brain to work in a science lab and experiment. I don't really know how to work science, but with my brain I'm going to invent a new dinosaur, or something. Santana isn't allowed to come with me which is bullying, but for some reason she doesn't fit in my suitcase so I can't sneak her in.

She opens the door to the lab.

SCIENTIST #1: You're Miss. Pierce, correct?

BRITTANY: I'm Brittany.

SCIENTIST #1: Okay...anyways, our team discovered you and are blown away by your intelligence. We asked you to come in today and see what you can do. It might be a risky thing to do, but we trust you.

BRITTANY: Awesome.

SCIENTIST #1: Follow me.

They make their way into the lab and stop by a table with different sorts of tools and liquids.

SCIENTIST #1: Use whatever you'd like.

BRITTANY pours a variety of different things into a tube then mixes it up.

BRITTANY: I think I'm done.

SCIENTIST #1: Great! We'll take a look at this and get back to you soon.

BRITTANY: Wait.

She tries to dip her finger into the mixture, but the scientist stops her.

SCIENTIST #1: Nope. You do not want to do that. This is extremely dangerous.

BRITTANY: Oh, it's fine.

SCIENTIST #1: Miss Pierce, you have to listen to me.

She dips her finger into it then licks it.

SCIENTIST #1: Oh my god. We have to call poison control. Harley?

BRITTANY runs out the door.

INT. The Lima Airport.

BRITTANY walks into the airport and there's breaking news on the TV behind her.

_New Virus in China by the name of "Covid-19" has pandemic potential. All workers in a local lab were infected, and are being quarantined. It is recommended to wear a mask when you leave your house to prevent spreading._

Everyone in the airport is freaking out. BRITTANY turns to look at the TV.

BRITTANY: Oops. I did it again.

**SCENE TWO. KLAINE'S GENDER REVEAL PARTY.**

The entire glee club, including BRITTANY, is gathered to find out the gender of Kurt and Blaine's baby. CAROLE and BURT are there as well. BRITTANY coughs. 

BLAINE: Brittany? Are you feeling okay?

BRITTANY: I'm fine. My throat is just a little tingly.

KURT: Do you think you could keep your distance from Rachel? We don't want anything to happen.

BRITTANY: Sure, Kurtsie.

KURT: Please don't call me that again.

BRITTANY sits at a table alone in the corner. SANTANA sits next to her.

SANTANA: If you're feeling sick we need to go. You can not get Rachel sick. 

BRITTANY: I'm fine. I promise.

SANTANA: As much as I would like to cough on Berry if she wasn't pregnant, she needs to be at her 100% right now.

BLAINE and KURT are standing in front of everyone, about to make an announcement. 

BLAINE: Hey everyone! Thanks for coming and spending a little bit of your afternoon with us. Before we begin, can we all give Rachel a round of applause?

Everyone claps for her.

KURT: We can't thank her enough for offering to carry our baby. Why don't we get on with finding out the gender already?

Everyone begins to count down. BLAINE runs over to light the color bomb. He runs back and it explodes. It immediately starts a fire. Pink smoke fills the sky. 

KURT: Oh. My. God.

BLAINE: Shit. Can someone make sure Rachel's okay?

KURT: What do we do??

BLAINE: Why are we just standing here??

TINA: I'll call the fire department.

QUINN: Are you guys literally stupid? We need to get out of here. Now.

They all evacuate and the fire is spreading rapidly. The firemen arrive and try to put out the fire, but it isn't doing much.

INT. KURT and BLAINE's interview with CNN.

NEWS REPORTER: Today I'm here with singer-songwriter, Blaine Anderson, and fashion icon Kurt Hummel. Now, there has been a lot of speculation going around that you started the east coast fires with your gender reveal party. Would you care to elaborate?

BLAINE: I-

KURT: We didn't start the fires. We would never do that. It most certainly isn't our faults. The company who makes these gender reveal bombs are responsible. Of course, Blaine and I are completely devastated that these fires are happening. We have donated to several different fundraisers. We are trying to help out as much as we can, as we did set off the bomb, but we are absolutely not responsible for the fires.

NEWS REPORTER: Are you aware that Brittany Pierce, who was at your gender reveal party, is responsible for Covid-19? 

BLAINE: What?

**SCENE THREE. SAMCEDES' HOUSE.**

SAM and MERCEDES are several feet apart from each other, and are clearly sick.

MERCEDES: I can't believe this is happening.

SAM: We're going to be fine.

MERCEDES: What if I never sing again?

SAM: Don't act like Rachel.

MERCEDES: I'm baffled that you think that I'm acting like Rachel Berry right now.

SAM: Speaking of Rachel, did she test negative?

MERCEDES: Yup. I can't believe that she and Jesse are the only ones who don't have it.

SAM: Anyways, even if you can't sing again, there's always Only Fans?

MERCEDES: Have you lost your mind?

SAM: What?

MERCEDES: I'm not resulting to Only Fans as a second career. 

SAM: I'm just saying that you don't have to worry about not singing again. That's a bit of a stretch, don't you think?

MERCEDES: Whatever. I'm going to try to get rid of this so I can continue recording my album.

SAM: I can make you soup.

MERCEDES: No thanks.

**SCENE FOUR. NEW DIRECTION ZOOM.**

The New Directions are all on a zoom, including WILL.

WILL: What I have gathered from this year is that we all need to come together. Unite, despite our differences. We need to have a close bond like we all did when we sang Don't Stop Believing for the first time. Especially with all of the loss this year, we need to have each other's backs. Which is why...we need to sing WAP.

BLAINE: Oh my god. Absolutely not.

MERCEDES: We are in the middle of a pandemic, an election, and racial injustice and you think that singing a song about sex is going to cure that?

RACHEL: Besides, I'm almost 9 months pregnant. I can't do dance right now. 

WILL: This song is about empowerment, and we need that right now!

WAP begins to play and everyone starts to leave the zoom. WILL doesn't notice until he's done that he's alone.

**SCENE FIVE. OUTSIDE OF THE WHITE HOUSE.**

SUE walks out of The White House, with secret service following her. She has scissors in her hands. Everyone around her is starstuck that the vice president is in their presence. She walks past groups of people and cuts their masks off. 

SUE: Masks don't work you snowflakes. Our president has everything under control.

She marches back into The White House.


End file.
